Today was a very busy day, it seemed to pass very quickly. I got up about 8 and was out the door an hour and a half later. First stop was ACS to get the needed signatures for the EROD paperwork. Second stop was the Newborn network. We did infant massage, Graham really seemed to enjoy it, until he realized it was time to eat of course.
We stopped over at Sarah's house when we got home at about 12. Abby looks great and was as happy as ever. Next stop was Lori's. I had to do my check ups to make sure my friends were doing all right with their husbands having left early that morning.
At about 1 we made it home, hoping to talk to Aaron online. No luck, but Kayla did fall asleep so I had some free time to get a quick workout in, or so I thought. 10 minutes into it Graham started crying and wouldn't let me put him down. I never got to finish, but I did get to clean the kitchen just a little bit and do a little laundry.
When Kayla finally woke up we went for a walk and to the playground. Overall it was a great day.
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Day 4 and 5
Day 4, which was Sunday was a pretty easy going day. I actually got to do the complete shred workout, and I felt amazing afterwards. We went grocery shopping for the week, stocked up on lots of good food. Still no word from Aaron since Friday.
Day 5
It was freezing cold this morning. We laid in bed until about 10 then I tried to get ready and get out of the house in time to go to the clinic before meeting Pam for lunch, no dice. The clinic waited until after lunch. Lunch was a ton of fun, the DFAC was celebrating the Army's 235th birthday so there was lobster and shrimp, delicious! I could have gotten a workout in at about 10 pm but I was exhausted! We'll try again tomorrow. I decided not to EROD, I'm just going home for the deployment once Graham's passports arrive, which is hopefully this week.
Day 5
It was freezing cold this morning. We laid in bed until about 10 then I tried to get ready and get out of the house in time to go to the clinic before meeting Pam for lunch, no dice. The clinic waited until after lunch. Lunch was a ton of fun, the DFAC was celebrating the Army's 235th birthday so there was lobster and shrimp, delicious! I could have gotten a workout in at about 10 pm but I was exhausted! We'll try again tomorrow. I decided not to EROD, I'm just going home for the deployment once Graham's passports arrive, which is hopefully this week.
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Day 3
I think I have a problem, and I'm obviously not handling Aaron's deployment as well as I thought I was. Today all I did was eat, and I wasn't eating healthy food per se. It tapered off by noon, but the damage had already been done. Seeing that I also didn't get a workout in and tomorrow is a weigh-in day, I'm gonna be in trouble. I also tried to think of some more stuff I could purchase. Those are the two things I do when I'm stressed, eat and spend money on things I don't necessarily need.
Graham scared the crap out of me today. He coughed up a little bit of blood. I was seriously freaking out for about 5 minutes.
Graham scared the crap out of me today. He coughed up a little bit of blood. I was seriously freaking out for about 5 minutes.
Friday, June 11, 2010
Day 2
Today was harder than yesterday, I had Kayla all day. She seems to have a hard time listening to me recently. I think she is pushing the boundaries to see just how much she can get away with. I'm trying to start a schedule during the day and hopefully reintroduce nap time around 1 pm. She has been passing out about 4 the last few days, and she naps for 2 hours. It's great because I get some down time, but then she is awake until 10 and I'd like to have some down time in the evenings before I go to bed as well as during the day.
I was actually able to get the full workout in today of the 30 day shred. It was tough, but I felt really good afterwards. I even had extra time to grill some pork chops and eat one before Kayla woke up.
Today we walked to VES for field day. Instead of watching the events, we helped bag 625 bags of popcorn! We had fun. Kayla was practicing catching tossed food in her mouth, she's getting pretty good at it! My neighbor told me her goal was to teach Kayla how to spit in the grass. Seriously, that's the best she can do. Teach a 2 year old girl how to spit. Real Klassy, with a capital K!
We were able to chat on Yahoo with Aaron today. We tried to skype but his internet connection was too slow to support it. I wish he would call I love hearing his voice, it makes everything better.
I got a new wrap in the mail today. I absolutely love it! There are about 4 more that I'd like to purchase, then my set will be complete. Yes, 8 woven wraps are not enough! There are just so many variations, and they are so versatile. I put Graham in a back wrap today. I did well the first time while looking at the instructions, the second time without looking didn't go over so well. It will take a couple more times of practice and then we are on our way!
I was actually able to get the full workout in today of the 30 day shred. It was tough, but I felt really good afterwards. I even had extra time to grill some pork chops and eat one before Kayla woke up.
Today we walked to VES for field day. Instead of watching the events, we helped bag 625 bags of popcorn! We had fun. Kayla was practicing catching tossed food in her mouth, she's getting pretty good at it! My neighbor told me her goal was to teach Kayla how to spit in the grass. Seriously, that's the best she can do. Teach a 2 year old girl how to spit. Real Klassy, with a capital K!
We were able to chat on Yahoo with Aaron today. We tried to skype but his internet connection was too slow to support it. I wish he would call I love hearing his voice, it makes everything better.
I got a new wrap in the mail today. I absolutely love it! There are about 4 more that I'd like to purchase, then my set will be complete. Yes, 8 woven wraps are not enough! There are just so many variations, and they are so versatile. I put Graham in a back wrap today. I did well the first time while looking at the instructions, the second time without looking didn't go over so well. It will take a couple more times of practice and then we are on our way!
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Day 1
I only broke down once today. I was waiting for the doctors to get Graham's ultrasound. I just wanted my husband there with me. The doctors were talking about keeping Graham for 24 hours so that they could put some wire down his throat and measure the acid levels, I was not okay with that, especially without Aaron.
I tried to do the shred workout this morning, but of course as soon as I started it Graham woke up, and I never got another chance to complete it. I'll try again tomorrow.
I took some great photos of Kayla today, and I got one of Graham wrapped up on me while waiting for the paperwork at the hospital. I also saw a spider with one of those mosquito killers caught in its web, by the time I grabbed my camera the spider was no longer attacking it, but I took a picture anyway.
It was super hot in my house today, which is probably why I wasn't inside much today. I can't wait to experience air conditioning again. 90 degree days with no AC is awful!
I tried to do the shred workout this morning, but of course as soon as I started it Graham woke up, and I never got another chance to complete it. I'll try again tomorrow.
I took some great photos of Kayla today, and I got one of Graham wrapped up on me while waiting for the paperwork at the hospital. I also saw a spider with one of those mosquito killers caught in its web, by the time I grabbed my camera the spider was no longer attacking it, but I took a picture anyway.
It was super hot in my house today, which is probably why I wasn't inside much today. I can't wait to experience air conditioning again. 90 degree days with no AC is awful!
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
T-minus 3 hours
In 3 hours, I will be a single mother. In 3 hours my world will come crashing down. In 3 hours, hell I just hope I can make it through the next 3 hours. It's funny how I've been okay all day, but the second I got home and actually sat down everything just hit me. I'm glad I'm going home, I just wish I were leaving sooner.
On a positive note...since tomorrow is the beginning of the next chapter of my life I am beginning some new routines. I had my 6 week postpartum check today and I'm clear for exercise. Therefore, tomorrow starts day 1 of the 30 day shred! It also begins day 1 of 365 days of pictures. I'm going to try for a single picture every day that sums up that day, either what I want it to be, or what it was. There will also be a new picture every day of my babies.
Please keep my family and I in your prayers on this day.
On a positive note...since tomorrow is the beginning of the next chapter of my life I am beginning some new routines. I had my 6 week postpartum check today and I'm clear for exercise. Therefore, tomorrow starts day 1 of the 30 day shred! It also begins day 1 of 365 days of pictures. I'm going to try for a single picture every day that sums up that day, either what I want it to be, or what it was. There will also be a new picture every day of my babies.
Please keep my family and I in your prayers on this day.
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
I'm a Snob and I'm better than you
I've come to accept the fact that I'm a snob. Most people with my condition(snobbiness) would defend themselves and say something like "I'm not a snob, I'm selective," but I'm going to own my snobbiness. I'm not talking about money here, I mean we barely make $36,000 a year. I'm talking about persons. I feel superior to various types of people. If you're married with children and you're out drinking every weekend until midnight, I'm better than you. If you have no drive, no ambition, I'm better than you. If you yell at your children for the things that children do, i.e. try to be the center of attention when they're not (say at a baby shower), I'm better than you. If you don't research things for yourself and just go with the majority, I'm better than you.
Basically, I judge you on everything you do. If I think I'm better than you, I will no longer speak to you.
Basically, I judge you on everything you do. If I think I'm better than you, I will no longer speak to you.
Losing My Mind
I am slowly but surely losing my mind. I am one of the most easy going people you will ever meet, yet I have been getting frustrated by everything here lately.
I almost want to say it's postpartum depression. The only thing stopping me from that is my symptoms don't match up. I have plenty of energy, I'm not "blue", I'm bonding just fine with Graham, I just get frustrated and angry very easily, usually at my children. I spanked Kayla today. I don't believe in spanking, and even if I did, what she was doing was not a spankable offense.
I was making myself a ham sandwich since it was 2:30 and the only thing I had eaten all day was a carnation instant breakfast, Graham was content, at least he was when I started making my sandwich, which was before Kayla started trying to pick him up. So he was crying, and Kayla wanted watermelon so she was crying. Kayla picked up a knife and gave it to me so I could cut the watermelon, but it was a steak knife. I told her that knife wouldn't work, took it from her and threw it in the sink. She opened the cabinet under the sink and climbed on the shelf to get the knife out of the sink. I asked her to get down, and once again told her it was the wrong knife. She didn't listen, so I took her off the shelf myself.
She started screaming. Graham was screaming in the living room, Kayla was screaming in the kitchen, I couldn't get Graham until my sandwich was made or I wasn't going to get to eat. I couldn't make my sandwich because Kayla was screaming and climbing on things trying to grab a very sharp knife. Kayla tried again to climb up to the sink to grab the knife, I once again took her down and shut the cabinet doors. She screamed and cried louder. I had to hold the doors shut, she tried and tried to open them, so I spanked her butt.
I felt horrible! What is spanking going to teach her? Especially for that reason? I just get so overwhelmed sometimes when the two of them are crying at the same time. It got to the point today that Graham was crying and I couldn't figure out why, but he wouldn't stop and I was getting very frustrated so I put him in his crib, shut his door went into my bathroom to get a shower, Kayla started crying that she wanted to come with me, so I shut and locked my bedroom door, shut my bathroom door and took a 2 minute "shower" just to calm down.
It worked at least. When I picked Graham up he stopped crying almost instantly, and Kayla was all smiles when I opened up my bedroom door. I still felt guilty for leaving them alone screaming, but what's a mom to do?
I almost want to say it's postpartum depression. The only thing stopping me from that is my symptoms don't match up. I have plenty of energy, I'm not "blue", I'm bonding just fine with Graham, I just get frustrated and angry very easily, usually at my children. I spanked Kayla today. I don't believe in spanking, and even if I did, what she was doing was not a spankable offense.
I was making myself a ham sandwich since it was 2:30 and the only thing I had eaten all day was a carnation instant breakfast, Graham was content, at least he was when I started making my sandwich, which was before Kayla started trying to pick him up. So he was crying, and Kayla wanted watermelon so she was crying. Kayla picked up a knife and gave it to me so I could cut the watermelon, but it was a steak knife. I told her that knife wouldn't work, took it from her and threw it in the sink. She opened the cabinet under the sink and climbed on the shelf to get the knife out of the sink. I asked her to get down, and once again told her it was the wrong knife. She didn't listen, so I took her off the shelf myself.
She started screaming. Graham was screaming in the living room, Kayla was screaming in the kitchen, I couldn't get Graham until my sandwich was made or I wasn't going to get to eat. I couldn't make my sandwich because Kayla was screaming and climbing on things trying to grab a very sharp knife. Kayla tried again to climb up to the sink to grab the knife, I once again took her down and shut the cabinet doors. She screamed and cried louder. I had to hold the doors shut, she tried and tried to open them, so I spanked her butt.
I felt horrible! What is spanking going to teach her? Especially for that reason? I just get so overwhelmed sometimes when the two of them are crying at the same time. It got to the point today that Graham was crying and I couldn't figure out why, but he wouldn't stop and I was getting very frustrated so I put him in his crib, shut his door went into my bathroom to get a shower, Kayla started crying that she wanted to come with me, so I shut and locked my bedroom door, shut my bathroom door and took a 2 minute "shower" just to calm down.
It worked at least. When I picked Graham up he stopped crying almost instantly, and Kayla was all smiles when I opened up my bedroom door. I still felt guilty for leaving them alone screaming, but what's a mom to do?
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