Essential Living

About 18 months ago, I began to look into Young Living essential oils. I finally dove in around February 2013. We were short on cash, so I wasn't able to get many oils. I got the cheapest starter kit I could. It came with 5 ml bottles of lavender and peppermint. I was hooked! It took another year before I really began investing in oils. They have served me well. From healing ear infections, to easing pain from arthritis, repelling mosquitos and blocking the sun, essential oils have become my go-to. I have very recently started an internship on the way to a successful business teaching others about oils and how they can help. If only they weren't taking so long to ship. On the road to health and wealth.

Back to Basics

It's a little weird going back to blogs long since forgotten. My last post was over 3 years ago, and my have things changed(or not). Remember that wish about being pregnant with a friend? Well, it happened, only my friend miscarried at 14 weeks. My daughter is now 14 months old, and my friend is due any day now with her daughter! I still don't feel like I can be myself around my family, they seem to always be questioning my decisions, like I do things just to be different and not because I do the research. Apparently, when they do this I immediately become defensive, self-righteous, and condescending. You know, because constantly questioning a parent's decisions isn't attacking. Here's the thing, every decision I make involving my children has been thoroughly researched. I don't take their health and safety lightly. Yes, my 14 month old still nurses, even in the middle of the night. Guess what, the WHO recommends breastfeeding for a MINIMUM of 2 years. No, my 14 month old child hasn't received any vaccinations, maybe once she is 2 we will slowly give them, but she doesn't need them now. The US childhood immunization schedule specifies 26 vaccine doses for infants aged less than 1 year—the most in the world—yet 33 nations have lower infant mortality rates! http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3170075/
I try not to scream at my children, sometimes I fail and raise my voice. I am only human, and I grew up in a household where screaming was/is the norm. I am trying to change that for my children because it doesn't help any situation. I do not hit my children. Nothing they could do would deserve a violent reaction, it does not mean they are not disciplined. Yes, my children don't like to sit still for more than 15 minutes. THEY'RE CHILDREN! Being active is a good thing! Maybe a little late, but I digress.

I'm an Aunt!

My sister-in-law had her baby at 23:50 PST. Trent Tiofilo was 6lbs 7oz, 20 inches long. He was also 5 weeks early! Imagine how big he would have been if she had gone 40 weeks. I am very happy for Heather and Joel on the newest addition to their family, and I cannot wait to meet the little fella. It won't be for quite some time, but looking forward to it anyway. Aaron's best friend also welcomed his son within the last week, so Trent and Anthony have a best friend from birth.

Having a child so close to a friend has got to be amazing. You are both going through the same stages and can really connect through that. When I have another child, I would love to be pregnant with a friend, although I don't see that ever happening. Congratulations again to Heather and Joel on the birth of Trent.

Aaron is home!

First a short update, I'm not pregnant, I didn't go back to Germany after my birthday. I'm a waffler, what else can I say?

Now to the heart of the matter, Aaron is home! He finally made it back to our home in Germany! I really wish I was there to welcome him home, but alas I had things to finish here. He will be making his first in two years stateside appearance on May 20, when he meets us in Orlando, FL. Only a short 30 days from now!

I am a trained doula! I finished my coursework about a month ago and I am working on the business side of things. When I get everything up and running, I will be sure to post the link to my business blog here for all to see. I am hoping to work mostly with military wives whose husbands are not able to make it to the delivery, but I will be available to non-military as well.

Type at you soon!

I just can't anymore...

I am so sick of doing everything because it's what somebody else wants or expects me to do. Almost everything in my being is saying go back to Germany after my birthday. Everytime I think I've made the decision to do just that, I stop myself. I really want to watch Vinny play baseball, and be here for his graduation. But is that just me being so over-reliant on my family again. I am constantly saying that Aaron's parent's need to realize that we are his family now, and we come first. Yet I am still putting the $a clan before mine and Aaron's family. At the same time, I can't help but wonder is wanting to watch Vinny play baseball really about Vinny, or is it about just wanting to go to baseball games? I think it's just about going to baseball games. In which case, I will just have to go to the baseball games in Germany. There is a semi-professional league not too far away.

There it is, I'm headed back sometime shortly after my birthday. I need to suck it up and stand up for what is best for my family. Damn, I have a lot to do. At most 8 weeks to do it in.

Birth...the American Way

I just read a woman's birth story. It was her third child, the first 9lbs, the second, 10 lbs. Both were normal vaginal deliveries with no complications. At 37 wks, her OB did a growth ultrasound and told her baby was 10 lbs and recommended a c/s. She consented, and at 37 wks said c/s was performed. Baby was 5lbs 6oz!!!!

The problems with this are as follows. The woman is obviously capable of giving birth to large babies, she has done it twice, why would an OB try to tell her otherwise? Oh that's right he makes more money off a c/s and has complete control. That child is now considered a preemie! He is at a higher risk for all sorts of complications simply because a doctor decided so.

This is birth the American way. My next birth (which could be in as little as 7 months) will not be in the American way, at least not present day America.

I say could be because I'm not positive that I'm not pregnant at the moment. Yes I have taken several HPTs that have been negative, but I feel "off". I also noticed today that Graham's poop was seedy, which was my first indication in Kayla that I was pregnant with Graham. So maybe I took the tests too early, or I could just be imagining things. Only time, or another test, will tell.

Decisions, Apologies, and Realizations

The time is quickly approaching to make a decision on when to return to Germany. There have been rumors that Aaron will be returning as early as March. These are of course rumors, although supposedly from a very reliable source. What do I do? Return in January to re-acclimate in time for Aaron's return? Return in June, when Aaron will definitely be back and the Spring semester will be over? Or never return? It seems to be a near impossible decision


I miss Germany. I miss the freedom I had there. I miss my friends. I miss the fresh air. I miss how healthy I felt. Germany was great for me. It was truly the first time that I was on my own. Maybe I need more of that. Sometimes I feel like I'm still struggling to figure out who I am, and as long as I am living in Nashville I will never be able to figure it out. My identity seems to be my family.


I had plans to take a couple science classes this Spring, nursing pre-reqs and such. Kayla has a dance recital in June, which we already put a $70 deposit down for her outfit. Vinny graduates in May, something I want to be here for, and it's also his last season of baseball which I would love to see, I missed baseball in Germany.


So what takes priority? How I felt, what I need, what I want? What Kayla wants? What Aaron wants? What I feel is best for our family? What if they overlap into both options?


Apologies are in order. It seems as though a previous post hurt the feelings of someone very close to me. It was not my intention, just my venting. Maybe I should rethink my openness here. It seems as though that would be counterproductive. My entries help me to see things more clearly and not typing everything hinders that. Just please remember, my intentions are never to hurt anyone.


I have come to realize, that I listen to other people entirely too much when it comes to parenting. I have been trying to get Graham to sleep through the night. Several people have told me that he shouldn't still be nursing at night, and so I've been trying to stop the nighttime nursings. This has proven to be very difficult. Graham cries inconsolably when I refuse to feed him. It's not good for either of us. He will stop nursing at night when he is ready. Kayla was still nursing at night when she was Graham's age. I don't think she stopped night nursings until about 15 months. So Graham will nurse whenever he wants, and he will sleep through the night when he is ready. 


I believe I have made my decision on when to go back. I will post my decision when I am 100% sure of it.